"Funny-Looking People in the IEEE Transactions On Pattern Analysis And Machine Intelligence"

An exciting (semi-)(less-than-)weekly feature!

Last updated January 21, 2005

    Most people in the world share a common guilty pleasure: we love to read back-issues of a magazine called "IEEE Transactions On Pattern Analysis And Machine Intelligence."  And if you're like me you've often suspected that IEEE isn't really an acronym for "Institute Of Electrical and Electronic Engineers"...it's actually a short form for "Aiyeee!  The people who write these articles are  funny-looking!"

    So, to do tribute to this magazine and the funny-looking people who write for it, I present this weekly expose.  Every (ahem!) Thursday we'll examine a new funny-looking contributor.  We'll talk briefly about their accomplishments, and compare their mid-80's photographs with more current ones to find out: are they still funny-looking, fifteen years later?  Do they look better or worse?  How could they improve their appearance?  Is this the best they can do?  For added fun we'll refer to them using anagrams of their actual names, which may also lessen the chance of us getting sued.

    Join us as we celebrate our shameless obsession with physical appearance, and hold trivial features above the considerable accomplishments of people smarter than we are!  All are welcome!

 Gizoo Le Rogue!

Then

Now

     Notorious mathematics criminal Gizoo Le Rogue was known for his brilliant heists during the early 60's.  Using only his slide rule and protractor, Gizoo stole millions of dollars from bank vaults around the world, which he used to finance his research into Lebesgue Integration, the Bayes Error Rates, and the patented "Gizoo Pomp Hairstyle," which he is still perfecting today (see above: wispier and higher than ever before!).

     In the mid-80's he decided to "go straight."  Submitting his findings to reputable journals under a new (less conspicuous) name, he acquired a new reputation, a new pair of glasses and a new set of jowels.  He views his early days of mathematical thuggery with some degree of shame (38 degrees, to be exact), but he feels very little shame about his funny looking face, which he hasn't bothered to fix since.

The Archives
March, 1987 (Featuring Canki Van Baldoor, Husan Sagmoth & Maev Joergensen III, Roxer Bantbund, Vaniel B. Loogey and Gizoo Le Rogue!)

    Offended?  Litigious?  Have no sense of humour?  This is the "Get My Funny-Looking Face Off Your Website" link, which doubles as the "Get My Client's Funny-Looking Face Off Your Website" link if you're a lawyer.

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